Talk the Talk and Walk the Walk

So this past week, I was down at the Texas Capitol, there with Students for Life of America. We were there in support of the Texas bill that protects women’s health by requiring that abortion clinics adhere to ambulatory surgical center regulations, that the abortionist have hospital admitting privileges within 30 miles, and that all medical abortions adhere to FDA regulations. It also bans abortions past 20 weeks, the point at which science says that the fetus can feel pain.  The bill thankfully passed on Friday, and Gov Perry is going to sign it into law. You can read a good summary of it here.

One of the things that has really impressed me this trip is the number of pro-lifers here in Texas who not only talk the talk, but walk the walk. People who understand what it means to be truly pro-life. This people recognize that it is not just about being a political activist, or the way you vote. These people are helping to build a culture of life that will ultimately lead to victory.

I just wanted to give  a couple shout-outs to some examples of the people that I am talking about:

Thanks to the Austin Baptist Association and Hope Chapel for opening their churches to us and providing us a place to sleep as well as all the other host families who opened their homes to students.

Thank you to the Knights of Columbus for gathering air mattresses for us to sleep on as well as cooking and providing lunch for us on Friday. Standing behind a grill in 100 degree weather is an impressive feat, and we are truly grateful.

Big thanks to Representative Hughes, Representative Toth, along with many other of the Texas House representatives. When the YMCA kicked us out (here), Rep Hughes and Rep Toth took up a collection to pay for hotel rooms so that we could shower. They had also offered their own personal hotel rooms for showers. Rep Hughes and Rep Toth also took time out of their day to speak to us young people and pray over the SFLA staff. They truly are men of God. Rep Hughes also offered us protection during the riots at the Capitol by housing all of us, over 50 people, in his locked office.

Thanks to the Students for Life leaders who did so much to organize this trip and keep all of us safe during the journey. I am sure it was not easy, but the staff remained flexible, with cheerful attitudes, despite the difficult circumstances. Thanks to Brendan O’Morchoe, who even if he could not figure out his way inside the Capitol, lead our group with a certainty and confidence that put many people’s fears at ease. Thank you to Beth O’Malley, for writing everything down in her notebook, keeping track of million logistics at once, and remaining sane, with a smile on her face, even when the plan changed for the third time in ten minutes. Thanks to Missy Martinez, for being the voice for our group, both in media interviews and on stage at the pro-life rally, and representing our group with conviction and dignity. Thank you to Alexa Coombs for reminding us of the importance of social media, making sure that we were always in contact with the rest of the world and utilizing social media to promote our group’s activities. I am sure there are many other people behind the scenes at SFLA, including Kristan Hawkins, the president of SFLA, who made this trip a possibility and for that I am very grateful.

Thank you to all the donors who made this trip possible for over 50 college students. These donors helped give us the opportunity of a lifetime and made it possible for us to be a part of history being made.

Thanks to Brendan the bus driver, as well as all the other bus drivers, for being patient with us and getting us to and from where we needed to be safely.

Thank you to the people of Texas, in particular, Jason, Paul, and Thomas, for inviting us to join this fight for life with them, and for all the tireless work that they do in Texas. This was a huge victory for Texas and thank you for letting us be a part of it.

Last, but definitely not least, thank you to my fellow students who took a week out of their summer to come and fight for life in Texas. You provided an incredible, peaceful witness for life at the Texas Capitol. Your dedication and perseverance is truly inspiring and it is seeing my fellow students stand for life that gives me hope. We are the pro-life generation and I believe that we will abolish abortion in our lifetime.

These people, along with many many more, all provided a witness of life through not only their words, but their actions. Standing for life is much more than just saying that you are pro-life. Words are not enough. We must demonstrate this culture of life through how we act, and the way we treat others. Consistently treating others with the respect and dignity that all people deserve helps our cause just as much as taking a trip down to Texas to support a pro-life bill. Thank you to everyone who remembers that, and pushes me to hold myself to that standard. Now go out and remember if you talk the talk, you must walk the walk.

Event Idea: "I'm Prolife Because..." Cookout

"Why are you, prolife?"

Sometimes one of the hardest events to do is a social event that still has an aspect of promoting the pro-life mission. These events, if done successful, can be some of the most effective at teaching people about what it means to be pro-life. This event idea stemmed from our original LifeFest event (here) , but we wanted to have an even stronger push to get people to think about what it truly means to be pro-life. 

So what we decided to do was have a huge cookout on the quad. The idea was to draw as many people in who were just walking by. We offered free burgers and soon, a huge line had lined up to get a burger. While people were in line, we handed them a white board that said “I’m Prolife Because…” and that asked them if they would be willing to fill in the blank. Most people did and it got them to stop and actually think about why they are prolife while having a great time celebrating life. 

So how do you do this?

Activities

Free burgers and food- Nothing gets people to stop by an event like free food. Especially when you are out on the quad on a sunny day. We had cupcakes that people could decorate as well. 

Inflatables/other fun visible activities- You want something big that signifies FUN! When people see a bounce house, or an inflatable obstacle course, they want to stop and see what is going on. This will also draw parents to bring their children. You can also publicize this for professors and their children to come to. We also hired a balloon animal artist to come and make balloon animals which were a huge hit. 

Free tshirts- One of the things we did was give away free club tshirts. This is obviously a major expense, but it was worth it to see the number of red club tshirts that were worn in the upcoming school days. Make sure the shirts are obviously pro-life and send the message that your club wants to send. Encourage your club members to wear these shirts the day of the festival so a unified group can be seen. Giving out these tshirts also gives participants something tangible to take with them. We also gave out pro-life buttons. 

Event Idea: Girl Talk

Communication is a two-way street: one part speaking, one part listening. Without the second part - listening - communication  breaks down.

This past election season, politicians, news reporters, and other "authorities" spoke loudly and frequently about "women's issues," including abortion and contraception. But were they listening? Were they hearing what women were actually saying? Do we hear what the women around us are actually saying, on all sides of these issues?

The Pro-life movement proclaims the values of individual dignity, life, and family, but these ideologies have practical and very real, day to day ramifications for all people, and in a particular way, for women. Too often, people on both sides of these issues think they know what others think, and why. But do they?  Pro-lifers have a responsibility not only to act and speak on behalf of life, but to listen. Through listening, we affirm the dignity of others. Helen Alvare has challenged the Federal Government to do just that with her campaign Women Speak for Themselves. We can do the same in our own communities.

The Event

Pro-lifers have a duty to listen to the very real, very personal concerns and experiences of women in their communities. An open discussion series like Girl Talk can help get real conversation going on "women's issues," promote respect for women's individual feelings, thought and experiences, and provide a foundation for real progress to be made.

Pre-planning

Time: An hour is usually a good amount of time for this series. Choose a time and decide how frequently your series will run (weekly, bi-weekly, etc).  Also decide how many sessions you will have.

Location: Choose a cozy location that is inviting and easy to find, but private enough for participants to speak openly. Set up tables and chairs in small groups of about 5 or 6. Hold the series in the same location each time to build familiarity and comfort.

Topics: Choose which topics you will discuss each meeting, and find a video, article, or other prompt for discussion. Make sure to find prompts from a variety of perspectives; sometimes the best discussions spring from those disagreeing with or challenging a prompt.

Food and Drink: Sharing a meal or light snack will help create a more comfortable atmosphere for participants. Afternoon coffee and fruit, or evening dessert may work well.

Advertising: Spread the word through both personal invitations and mass marketing like posters. Convey the tone of an open discussion by emphasizing that in your advertising, such as by putting different phrases on a poster [example above].

Outline of the Event

10 min: Welcome guests as they arrive and introduce yourself. Direct them to take refreshments, take a seat, and begin reading the discussion article or talking to others at their table.

5 min: Speak to the group as a whole, introduce yourself again, and explain the goal of the event. Emphasize that each person has individual feelings, thoughts, and experiences that shape her views on issues, and encourage participants to explore and share those underlying reasons for their opinions. Ask that each table do introductions, and read and discuss the prompt at their tables.

20 min: Discussions at tables.

20 min: Have each table share ideas from their discussions with the whole group, and discuss as a group if relevant.

5 min: Have each participant share an insight or thought with the large group. Thank everyone for coming, and invite them to attend the next session.

Other Recommendations

• Have signs directing participants to the event
• Assign "table captains" to each table to help facilitate discussion and make all feel welcome
• Have cards or table tents at each table with values for the discussion such as the Virtues of Discourse.
• Have name tags
• Encourage participants to bring other friends in the future

Discussion Topic Ideas

• Views of feminism
• Relationships between men and women
• What women really want
• Beauty, attraction, and what it means to be sexy
• Contraception and other fertility technology like NaPro
• Abortion: how it affects women and what it offers women
• Women in the workplace
• Women and higher education
• The role of faith in women's lives

From Our Experience:
We had a 3-part series with the topics of feminism, birth control, and beauty/self-image. For our second session, we invited local NaPro Fertility Care Practitioner Suzy Younger to attend and answer questions about female fertility at the end of the discussion. Her attendance was the highlight of that session!

Girl Talk has been featured in:

University of Notre Dame Observer "Girl Talk Creates Conversation"

University of Notre Dame Rover "Girl Talk: Catholicism, contraception, and beauty"

HerCampus.com Notre Dame Chapter "'Girl Talk' Discussion Series Reaches out to Women at ND"

MY body, MY choice.

MY body, MY choice.

Recently, a video has been circulating the Internet of a group of feminists proclaiming “MY body, MY choice.” When a friend of mine posted this to her Facebook, I clicked to listen to the entirety of it and came away feeling sad and dejected. The idea had so much potential, but the direction they took it in, just undermined the entire idea of the project. I could see glimmers of what they truly yearned for in the video, but they instead turned to what society told them it meant to be women as opposed to standing for what it means to truly be a woman.

I have pulled some quotes of what they say throughout this short video to highlight my points.

“I decide when and how I become a mother.”

Absolutely, women can decide when and how they become mothers. But this becomes a possibility every time a woman decides to have sex. By making this decision, a woman could become a mother. Women control when they have sex therefore they can control when they become mothers.

“These decisions have nothing to do with you.”

This statement is just blatantly wrong. All of our actions affect other people, whether we realize it or not. In the case of abortion, that decision can deeply affect the father of the child, the grandparents, the other future children, and most importantly the woman involved. This decision affects your neighbors, your classmates, your doctors. Society, as a whole, is deeply affected by the tragedy of abortion. Every single life is valuable and adds something to society. So every single abortion has affected the outcome of society. Who knows what those children who were aborted might have offered to society?

“I have the right to be screened for this killer of women./ Whether I go to my doctor or I rely on the services of clinics like those run by Planned Parenthood. And your desire to stop the fundings of abortions has nothing to do with my right to defend myself against cancer.”

Breast cancer screenings are very important and it is important to get mammograms. However, Planned Parenthood does not provide mammograms. All they can do to screen you for breast cancer is a breast exam, the same that you could and should be doing in your own home. Also Planned Parenthood’s main client base is young adults and it is not necessary to start getting mammograms until the age of 40. 

(http://www.thenewamerican.com/usnews/politics/item/13271-fda-contradicts-obama-planned-parenthood-not-licensed-to-do-mammograms)

“If I choose to have sex, I have the right to birth control.”

Birth control has never been a right. It’s not in the Constitution; it’s not a part of natural law. So where does this ‘right’ stem from? This notion has developed that people are entitled to the right to have sex without any consequences. Sex has been separated from its procreative purpose. If you choose to have sex, you choose to put yourself in the situation where you can get preganant, whether or not you are on birth control.

“I have the right to an abortion without facing intimidation, harassment, burdensome parental consent laws, or prejudicial taxes. If I decide to have an abortion, I will not undergo unnecessary invasive medical procedures for the purposes of your moralizing and personal edification.”

This statement is just ironic because many women who have abortions do it because of intimidation and harassment. The number of coerced abortions in this country is unbelievably high. Women’s boyfriends or husbands are threatening to leave them if they do not get an abortion. Some are physically abused into getting an abortion, some are emotionally abused. Calling parental consent laws ‘burdensome’ is ridiculous. Young women under the age of 18 years old are not allowed to pierce their ears without getting consent from their parents. If young women are not even able to legally make the decision to pierce their ears, a decision that can easily be reversed, why should they be able to undergo an invasive medical procedure that can have both medical and emotional side effects without the consent of their parents?  

“I am entitled to all health information from my doctor. And allowing myself to be penetrated once does not assume your right to do it again for your own purposes and your own reasons.”

Women are entitled to all health information from their doctor. Unfortunately abortion clinics are not providing all of this information. They gloss over the side effects of abortions, saying that they merely are required to provide this information by law. The emotional side effects that many women experience are never spoken of. The ultrasound bills that this woman is objecting to are an effort to provide women with all of the information necessary to make such a medical decision.

Then the women in this video went on to make some absolutely correct statements. These women know that they deserve to be respected, valued, and honored. They yearn for this. It is completely evident throughout this video. 

“I am not defined by my need of a man or a partner. Though I have the right to be made happy by one in a safe and supportive relationship”

“I am not here to be your sexual toy.”

 “I’m not defined by my hair, my weight, my eye color, my makeup, my bra size, my skin color.”

“I’m beautiful despite what you think. With or without your approval.”

“I have the right…to equal pay; to health care; to education; to divorce; to safety; to protection under the law; to respect and dignity; to complete equality.”

“Do not be afraid of a world in which women know themselves, their voice, and their power. That world has arrived.”

Unfortunately this world has not arrived. Women, such as the women in this video, have been duped by the world and society. They have become convinced that equality is the same as complete sexual freedom. This is because of the double standard that is so present in our society. They define being a woman as having access to birth control and abortion. When did the definition of a woman become so tied up in her sexuality? Women are so much more than their sexual desires. This is, and always will, a crucial part of what it means to be a woman. But it is not the whole picture.

So what does it mean when these women say “MY body. MY choice.”?

Men agree. They say. Your body. Your choice. Your problem.

When men are not supportive of women when they get pregnant, this is because of this mentality that has developed. They have been consistently told that it’s the woman’s body, therefore it’s the woman’s choice. This means that it must her problem. He is not allowed to have any input, so why are we surprised when so many men abandon their children?

 (As a side note, this video was co-created by a man. Interesting.)

Woman's Great Disease

THE WORST THING THAT COULD EVER HAPPEN TO A WOMAN.

THE ONE THING TO BE AVOIDED AT ALL COSTS.

THE DISEASE THAT WILL DESTROY YOUR LIFE FOREVER.

PREGNANCY.

What does this attitude say?

Not pregnant? You are a champion. A free woman. Victorious! Successful! Happy, joyful and freeeeeeeee!

Which means if you are pregnant… oh. Well then, uhmmmm…. Don't worry. It'll be ok. You'll make it through. Somehow. You have options. We can fix this. We can fix you.

But what if...

Disease : "a condition of the living animal or plant body… that impairs normal functioning and is typically manifested by distinguishing signs and symptoms; a harmful development." - Merriam-Webster

The Problem

Women can get pregnant. Men, cannot. So pregnancy is distinctive to women; it is a unique ability of their bodies, many would even say it is a unique gift.

The modern attitude, though, is that pregnancy is something more like a disease. It is a harmful and unfortunate circumstance that needs to be prevented, or if contracted - cured. Healthy bodies are free of disease. So to be healthy, women need to be free of this disease - free, in a sense, of their own bodies.

But there's something pretty degrading about telling women that there's something so wrong with their bodies, something so wrong with them.

Pregnancy is a huge deal. But it doesn't "impair" normal functioning of a woman's body. Having children is, in fact, VERY normal to a woman's body - it's what it is designed to do! So sending the message that pregnancy is a horrible, loathsome thing also sends the message that a woman's body is kind of loathsome, itself. And we all know that society/the media give women enough reasons already to dislike their bodies - we don't need more lies.

What women need is…

Support: in pregnancy - emotionally, physically, financially, etc. Nineteenth century suffragist Victoria Woodhull wrote that ideally, when a woman is pregnant, “it will be immediately held that she is laboring for society…she will become the especial care of society and, while she is performing this sacred duty, be paid the highest wages received by any class, and be treated accordingly during the entire [pregnancy].” Just imagine a world where that was the case!

Celebration: of the ridiculously awesome power women have to give life to entirely new unique human beings, that will exist for eternity!

Acceptance: of the way women's bodies work. When women have sex, they can get pregnant, and this incredible power should be respected with the reverence it deserves. [#casualaintcool] Women deserve the security of knowing the father will be around when she gets pregnant, which means waiting til marriage = pretty empowering, because it's about prioritizing the way woman is made.

Fertility is not a flaw.

Kid President: For Pregnant Women

This video has been sweeping the nation.  

 

"Send this video to someone who needs encouragement."

Kid president got me thinking. You know who could use some encouragement? Women. Facing possibly the scariest situation of their lives. Possibly with limited finances, resources, and support. Who gives women in crisis pregnancies a pep talk? Us.

I recently heard someone say that "our side is the side of optimism," and I agree. Why? Because the Pro-Life message is one of encouragement. It tells women: you can do this. We will help you. It tells them they are strong enough, capable enough, worthy enough of love, support, and a held hand down a road that, no matter which path, is going to be tough.

Kid President said it: "Life is not a game, people." And we know that. Life is infinitely precious, an indescribable gift, a beautiful unique creation.

"And if life is a game, aren't we all on the same team?... But if we're on the same team, let's start acting like it."

Women considering abortion are not the enemy. They are not our opponents, vying for the right to the unborn child. They are our sisters, and they need us. They need our encouragement; they deserve our encouragement, because they face a situation more difficult than many of us can imagine.

"Don't stop believing…keep going, keep going, keep going."

For women faced with an unexpected pregnancy, life as they planned it is no more. They may not believe they can make  it with a child, given their circumstances. They may not believe there is anyone to help them. They may not know if they are strong enough to carry a child and even then, whether or not to choose adoption for their child. They need encouragement. To keep going, keep believing in themselves and their dreams, in the ability to overcome what is difficult and make even more beautiful their life ahead.

"What if Michael Jordan had quit? What if he had never made Space Jam?

 From Beethoven to Justin Bieber, so many incredible people were born after their mothers were told to have an abortion. Who knows how many of our dear friends and classmates were once in danger of being aborted? Each and every child brought into this world brings something amazing, unique, and beautiful. And all mothers deserve the encouragement of knowing that about their child.

 "This is your time!"

Our sisters in crisis need encouragement. It's our job to give it to them.

"The world needs you."

 

#Prowomanprolife

 

Need a place to start? Click here.

Event Idea: Smiley Face Balloons/Stickers

Coke.  Apple. McDonalds. Disney. Facebook. Nike.

What do all of these groups have in common? A logo, or symbol for which they are known. A symbol that is recognizable and that evokes an emotion related to that group. Example: When I see the McDonalds yellow arched "M," I suddenly think of delicious fries that taste way too good to be so bad for me.

 

Pro-Life.

 

What image do you think of?

 

What emotion does that evoke?  

What about for other people? What do they think of when they hear that word? Unfortunately, for too many people, the image or emotion associated with "Pro-Life" is less than loving, less than supportive. Wherever they were given that impression, many people may need a new, more truthful, impression of what "Pro-Life" means - it means joy; it means love.

The Event

While your organization may not have contributed to the negative images/emotions that the word "Pro-Life" evokes, it still may need to combat them. This easy and cheap event can help do just that, and is great as a kick-off for Respect Life Week or the new school year or semester.

The Plan

Pass out smiley face stickers and balloons to anyone and everyone you can, in order to promote a positive Pro-Life message.

 

Supplies You'll Need

• Yellow smiley face stickers *can order in bulk online
• Smiley face balloons *can order in bulk online
• Ribbon or string
• Scissors
• Helium tanks
• Smiley face posters that say "I'm Pro-Life" to hang around your event

At the Event

Choose a location that has heavy traffic, for example outside the dining hall during lunch time. Hang smiley "I'm Pro-Life" posters around your location, and consider having a large poster of group information or list of upcoming events displayed. Greet people walking by and offer them a balloon/sticker. Play fun music and have someone take pictures of the event.

Tips & Tricks

• Consider taping information sheets [or if Respect Life Week, the week's schedule] to the bottom of the balloons' strings
• Have sign-ups for different shifts during the allotted time, and assign roles to volunteers such as balloon blowers, string tiers, and sticker or balloon distributers
• Cut string in advance so you don't have to do it the day of