MY body, MY choice.

MY body, MY choice.

Recently, a video has been circulating the Internet of a group of feminists proclaiming “MY body, MY choice.” When a friend of mine posted this to her Facebook, I clicked to listen to the entirety of it and came away feeling sad and dejected. The idea had so much potential, but the direction they took it in, just undermined the entire idea of the project. I could see glimmers of what they truly yearned for in the video, but they instead turned to what society told them it meant to be women as opposed to standing for what it means to truly be a woman.

I have pulled some quotes of what they say throughout this short video to highlight my points.

“I decide when and how I become a mother.”

Absolutely, women can decide when and how they become mothers. But this becomes a possibility every time a woman decides to have sex. By making this decision, a woman could become a mother. Women control when they have sex therefore they can control when they become mothers.

“These decisions have nothing to do with you.”

This statement is just blatantly wrong. All of our actions affect other people, whether we realize it or not. In the case of abortion, that decision can deeply affect the father of the child, the grandparents, the other future children, and most importantly the woman involved. This decision affects your neighbors, your classmates, your doctors. Society, as a whole, is deeply affected by the tragedy of abortion. Every single life is valuable and adds something to society. So every single abortion has affected the outcome of society. Who knows what those children who were aborted might have offered to society?

“I have the right to be screened for this killer of women./ Whether I go to my doctor or I rely on the services of clinics like those run by Planned Parenthood. And your desire to stop the fundings of abortions has nothing to do with my right to defend myself against cancer.”

Breast cancer screenings are very important and it is important to get mammograms. However, Planned Parenthood does not provide mammograms. All they can do to screen you for breast cancer is a breast exam, the same that you could and should be doing in your own home. Also Planned Parenthood’s main client base is young adults and it is not necessary to start getting mammograms until the age of 40. 

(http://www.thenewamerican.com/usnews/politics/item/13271-fda-contradicts-obama-planned-parenthood-not-licensed-to-do-mammograms)

“If I choose to have sex, I have the right to birth control.”

Birth control has never been a right. It’s not in the Constitution; it’s not a part of natural law. So where does this ‘right’ stem from? This notion has developed that people are entitled to the right to have sex without any consequences. Sex has been separated from its procreative purpose. If you choose to have sex, you choose to put yourself in the situation where you can get preganant, whether or not you are on birth control.

“I have the right to an abortion without facing intimidation, harassment, burdensome parental consent laws, or prejudicial taxes. If I decide to have an abortion, I will not undergo unnecessary invasive medical procedures for the purposes of your moralizing and personal edification.”

This statement is just ironic because many women who have abortions do it because of intimidation and harassment. The number of coerced abortions in this country is unbelievably high. Women’s boyfriends or husbands are threatening to leave them if they do not get an abortion. Some are physically abused into getting an abortion, some are emotionally abused. Calling parental consent laws ‘burdensome’ is ridiculous. Young women under the age of 18 years old are not allowed to pierce their ears without getting consent from their parents. If young women are not even able to legally make the decision to pierce their ears, a decision that can easily be reversed, why should they be able to undergo an invasive medical procedure that can have both medical and emotional side effects without the consent of their parents?  

“I am entitled to all health information from my doctor. And allowing myself to be penetrated once does not assume your right to do it again for your own purposes and your own reasons.”

Women are entitled to all health information from their doctor. Unfortunately abortion clinics are not providing all of this information. They gloss over the side effects of abortions, saying that they merely are required to provide this information by law. The emotional side effects that many women experience are never spoken of. The ultrasound bills that this woman is objecting to are an effort to provide women with all of the information necessary to make such a medical decision.

Then the women in this video went on to make some absolutely correct statements. These women know that they deserve to be respected, valued, and honored. They yearn for this. It is completely evident throughout this video. 

“I am not defined by my need of a man or a partner. Though I have the right to be made happy by one in a safe and supportive relationship”

“I am not here to be your sexual toy.”

 “I’m not defined by my hair, my weight, my eye color, my makeup, my bra size, my skin color.”

“I’m beautiful despite what you think. With or without your approval.”

“I have the right…to equal pay; to health care; to education; to divorce; to safety; to protection under the law; to respect and dignity; to complete equality.”

“Do not be afraid of a world in which women know themselves, their voice, and their power. That world has arrived.”

Unfortunately this world has not arrived. Women, such as the women in this video, have been duped by the world and society. They have become convinced that equality is the same as complete sexual freedom. This is because of the double standard that is so present in our society. They define being a woman as having access to birth control and abortion. When did the definition of a woman become so tied up in her sexuality? Women are so much more than their sexual desires. This is, and always will, a crucial part of what it means to be a woman. But it is not the whole picture.

So what does it mean when these women say “MY body. MY choice.”?

Men agree. They say. Your body. Your choice. Your problem.

When men are not supportive of women when they get pregnant, this is because of this mentality that has developed. They have been consistently told that it’s the woman’s body, therefore it’s the woman’s choice. This means that it must her problem. He is not allowed to have any input, so why are we surprised when so many men abandon their children?

 (As a side note, this video was co-created by a man. Interesting.)

Woman's Great Disease

THE WORST THING THAT COULD EVER HAPPEN TO A WOMAN.

THE ONE THING TO BE AVOIDED AT ALL COSTS.

THE DISEASE THAT WILL DESTROY YOUR LIFE FOREVER.

PREGNANCY.

What does this attitude say?

Not pregnant? You are a champion. A free woman. Victorious! Successful! Happy, joyful and freeeeeeeee!

Which means if you are pregnant… oh. Well then, uhmmmm…. Don't worry. It'll be ok. You'll make it through. Somehow. You have options. We can fix this. We can fix you.

But what if...

Disease : "a condition of the living animal or plant body… that impairs normal functioning and is typically manifested by distinguishing signs and symptoms; a harmful development." - Merriam-Webster

The Problem

Women can get pregnant. Men, cannot. So pregnancy is distinctive to women; it is a unique ability of their bodies, many would even say it is a unique gift.

The modern attitude, though, is that pregnancy is something more like a disease. It is a harmful and unfortunate circumstance that needs to be prevented, or if contracted - cured. Healthy bodies are free of disease. So to be healthy, women need to be free of this disease - free, in a sense, of their own bodies.

But there's something pretty degrading about telling women that there's something so wrong with their bodies, something so wrong with them.

Pregnancy is a huge deal. But it doesn't "impair" normal functioning of a woman's body. Having children is, in fact, VERY normal to a woman's body - it's what it is designed to do! So sending the message that pregnancy is a horrible, loathsome thing also sends the message that a woman's body is kind of loathsome, itself. And we all know that society/the media give women enough reasons already to dislike their bodies - we don't need more lies.

What women need is…

Support: in pregnancy - emotionally, physically, financially, etc. Nineteenth century suffragist Victoria Woodhull wrote that ideally, when a woman is pregnant, “it will be immediately held that she is laboring for society…she will become the especial care of society and, while she is performing this sacred duty, be paid the highest wages received by any class, and be treated accordingly during the entire [pregnancy].” Just imagine a world where that was the case!

Celebration: of the ridiculously awesome power women have to give life to entirely new unique human beings, that will exist for eternity!

Acceptance: of the way women's bodies work. When women have sex, they can get pregnant, and this incredible power should be respected with the reverence it deserves. [#casualaintcool] Women deserve the security of knowing the father will be around when she gets pregnant, which means waiting til marriage = pretty empowering, because it's about prioritizing the way woman is made.

Fertility is not a flaw.