MY body, MY choice.

MY body, MY choice.

Recently, a video has been circulating the Internet of a group of feminists proclaiming “MY body, MY choice.” When a friend of mine posted this to her Facebook, I clicked to listen to the entirety of it and came away feeling sad and dejected. The idea had so much potential, but the direction they took it in, just undermined the entire idea of the project. I could see glimmers of what they truly yearned for in the video, but they instead turned to what society told them it meant to be women as opposed to standing for what it means to truly be a woman.

I have pulled some quotes of what they say throughout this short video to highlight my points.

“I decide when and how I become a mother.”

Absolutely, women can decide when and how they become mothers. But this becomes a possibility every time a woman decides to have sex. By making this decision, a woman could become a mother. Women control when they have sex therefore they can control when they become mothers.

“These decisions have nothing to do with you.”

This statement is just blatantly wrong. All of our actions affect other people, whether we realize it or not. In the case of abortion, that decision can deeply affect the father of the child, the grandparents, the other future children, and most importantly the woman involved. This decision affects your neighbors, your classmates, your doctors. Society, as a whole, is deeply affected by the tragedy of abortion. Every single life is valuable and adds something to society. So every single abortion has affected the outcome of society. Who knows what those children who were aborted might have offered to society?

“I have the right to be screened for this killer of women./ Whether I go to my doctor or I rely on the services of clinics like those run by Planned Parenthood. And your desire to stop the fundings of abortions has nothing to do with my right to defend myself against cancer.”

Breast cancer screenings are very important and it is important to get mammograms. However, Planned Parenthood does not provide mammograms. All they can do to screen you for breast cancer is a breast exam, the same that you could and should be doing in your own home. Also Planned Parenthood’s main client base is young adults and it is not necessary to start getting mammograms until the age of 40. 

(http://www.thenewamerican.com/usnews/politics/item/13271-fda-contradicts-obama-planned-parenthood-not-licensed-to-do-mammograms)

“If I choose to have sex, I have the right to birth control.”

Birth control has never been a right. It’s not in the Constitution; it’s not a part of natural law. So where does this ‘right’ stem from? This notion has developed that people are entitled to the right to have sex without any consequences. Sex has been separated from its procreative purpose. If you choose to have sex, you choose to put yourself in the situation where you can get preganant, whether or not you are on birth control.

“I have the right to an abortion without facing intimidation, harassment, burdensome parental consent laws, or prejudicial taxes. If I decide to have an abortion, I will not undergo unnecessary invasive medical procedures for the purposes of your moralizing and personal edification.”

This statement is just ironic because many women who have abortions do it because of intimidation and harassment. The number of coerced abortions in this country is unbelievably high. Women’s boyfriends or husbands are threatening to leave them if they do not get an abortion. Some are physically abused into getting an abortion, some are emotionally abused. Calling parental consent laws ‘burdensome’ is ridiculous. Young women under the age of 18 years old are not allowed to pierce their ears without getting consent from their parents. If young women are not even able to legally make the decision to pierce their ears, a decision that can easily be reversed, why should they be able to undergo an invasive medical procedure that can have both medical and emotional side effects without the consent of their parents?  

“I am entitled to all health information from my doctor. And allowing myself to be penetrated once does not assume your right to do it again for your own purposes and your own reasons.”

Women are entitled to all health information from their doctor. Unfortunately abortion clinics are not providing all of this information. They gloss over the side effects of abortions, saying that they merely are required to provide this information by law. The emotional side effects that many women experience are never spoken of. The ultrasound bills that this woman is objecting to are an effort to provide women with all of the information necessary to make such a medical decision.

Then the women in this video went on to make some absolutely correct statements. These women know that they deserve to be respected, valued, and honored. They yearn for this. It is completely evident throughout this video. 

“I am not defined by my need of a man or a partner. Though I have the right to be made happy by one in a safe and supportive relationship”

“I am not here to be your sexual toy.”

 “I’m not defined by my hair, my weight, my eye color, my makeup, my bra size, my skin color.”

“I’m beautiful despite what you think. With or without your approval.”

“I have the right…to equal pay; to health care; to education; to divorce; to safety; to protection under the law; to respect and dignity; to complete equality.”

“Do not be afraid of a world in which women know themselves, their voice, and their power. That world has arrived.”

Unfortunately this world has not arrived. Women, such as the women in this video, have been duped by the world and society. They have become convinced that equality is the same as complete sexual freedom. This is because of the double standard that is so present in our society. They define being a woman as having access to birth control and abortion. When did the definition of a woman become so tied up in her sexuality? Women are so much more than their sexual desires. This is, and always will, a crucial part of what it means to be a woman. But it is not the whole picture.

So what does it mean when these women say “MY body. MY choice.”?

Men agree. They say. Your body. Your choice. Your problem.

When men are not supportive of women when they get pregnant, this is because of this mentality that has developed. They have been consistently told that it’s the woman’s body, therefore it’s the woman’s choice. This means that it must her problem. He is not allowed to have any input, so why are we surprised when so many men abandon their children?

 (As a side note, this video was co-created by a man. Interesting.)

Woman's Great Disease

THE WORST THING THAT COULD EVER HAPPEN TO A WOMAN.

THE ONE THING TO BE AVOIDED AT ALL COSTS.

THE DISEASE THAT WILL DESTROY YOUR LIFE FOREVER.

PREGNANCY.

What does this attitude say?

Not pregnant? You are a champion. A free woman. Victorious! Successful! Happy, joyful and freeeeeeeee!

Which means if you are pregnant… oh. Well then, uhmmmm…. Don't worry. It'll be ok. You'll make it through. Somehow. You have options. We can fix this. We can fix you.

But what if...

Disease : "a condition of the living animal or plant body… that impairs normal functioning and is typically manifested by distinguishing signs and symptoms; a harmful development." - Merriam-Webster

The Problem

Women can get pregnant. Men, cannot. So pregnancy is distinctive to women; it is a unique ability of their bodies, many would even say it is a unique gift.

The modern attitude, though, is that pregnancy is something more like a disease. It is a harmful and unfortunate circumstance that needs to be prevented, or if contracted - cured. Healthy bodies are free of disease. So to be healthy, women need to be free of this disease - free, in a sense, of their own bodies.

But there's something pretty degrading about telling women that there's something so wrong with their bodies, something so wrong with them.

Pregnancy is a huge deal. But it doesn't "impair" normal functioning of a woman's body. Having children is, in fact, VERY normal to a woman's body - it's what it is designed to do! So sending the message that pregnancy is a horrible, loathsome thing also sends the message that a woman's body is kind of loathsome, itself. And we all know that society/the media give women enough reasons already to dislike their bodies - we don't need more lies.

What women need is…

Support: in pregnancy - emotionally, physically, financially, etc. Nineteenth century suffragist Victoria Woodhull wrote that ideally, when a woman is pregnant, “it will be immediately held that she is laboring for society…she will become the especial care of society and, while she is performing this sacred duty, be paid the highest wages received by any class, and be treated accordingly during the entire [pregnancy].” Just imagine a world where that was the case!

Celebration: of the ridiculously awesome power women have to give life to entirely new unique human beings, that will exist for eternity!

Acceptance: of the way women's bodies work. When women have sex, they can get pregnant, and this incredible power should be respected with the reverence it deserves. [#casualaintcool] Women deserve the security of knowing the father will be around when she gets pregnant, which means waiting til marriage = pretty empowering, because it's about prioritizing the way woman is made.

Fertility is not a flaw.

Kid President: For Pregnant Women

This video has been sweeping the nation.  

 

"Send this video to someone who needs encouragement."

Kid president got me thinking. You know who could use some encouragement? Women. Facing possibly the scariest situation of their lives. Possibly with limited finances, resources, and support. Who gives women in crisis pregnancies a pep talk? Us.

I recently heard someone say that "our side is the side of optimism," and I agree. Why? Because the Pro-Life message is one of encouragement. It tells women: you can do this. We will help you. It tells them they are strong enough, capable enough, worthy enough of love, support, and a held hand down a road that, no matter which path, is going to be tough.

Kid President said it: "Life is not a game, people." And we know that. Life is infinitely precious, an indescribable gift, a beautiful unique creation.

"And if life is a game, aren't we all on the same team?... But if we're on the same team, let's start acting like it."

Women considering abortion are not the enemy. They are not our opponents, vying for the right to the unborn child. They are our sisters, and they need us. They need our encouragement; they deserve our encouragement, because they face a situation more difficult than many of us can imagine.

"Don't stop believing…keep going, keep going, keep going."

For women faced with an unexpected pregnancy, life as they planned it is no more. They may not believe they can make  it with a child, given their circumstances. They may not believe there is anyone to help them. They may not know if they are strong enough to carry a child and even then, whether or not to choose adoption for their child. They need encouragement. To keep going, keep believing in themselves and their dreams, in the ability to overcome what is difficult and make even more beautiful their life ahead.

"What if Michael Jordan had quit? What if he had never made Space Jam?

 From Beethoven to Justin Bieber, so many incredible people were born after their mothers were told to have an abortion. Who knows how many of our dear friends and classmates were once in danger of being aborted? Each and every child brought into this world brings something amazing, unique, and beautiful. And all mothers deserve the encouragement of knowing that about their child.

 "This is your time!"

Our sisters in crisis need encouragement. It's our job to give it to them.

"The world needs you."

 

#Prowomanprolife

 

Need a place to start? Click here.

Event Idea: Smiley Face Balloons/Stickers

Coke.  Apple. McDonalds. Disney. Facebook. Nike.

What do all of these groups have in common? A logo, or symbol for which they are known. A symbol that is recognizable and that evokes an emotion related to that group. Example: When I see the McDonalds yellow arched "M," I suddenly think of delicious fries that taste way too good to be so bad for me.

 

Pro-Life.

 

What image do you think of?

 

What emotion does that evoke?  

What about for other people? What do they think of when they hear that word? Unfortunately, for too many people, the image or emotion associated with "Pro-Life" is less than loving, less than supportive. Wherever they were given that impression, many people may need a new, more truthful, impression of what "Pro-Life" means - it means joy; it means love.

The Event

While your organization may not have contributed to the negative images/emotions that the word "Pro-Life" evokes, it still may need to combat them. This easy and cheap event can help do just that, and is great as a kick-off for Respect Life Week or the new school year or semester.

The Plan

Pass out smiley face stickers and balloons to anyone and everyone you can, in order to promote a positive Pro-Life message.

 

Supplies You'll Need

• Yellow smiley face stickers *can order in bulk online
• Smiley face balloons *can order in bulk online
• Ribbon or string
• Scissors
• Helium tanks
• Smiley face posters that say "I'm Pro-Life" to hang around your event

At the Event

Choose a location that has heavy traffic, for example outside the dining hall during lunch time. Hang smiley "I'm Pro-Life" posters around your location, and consider having a large poster of group information or list of upcoming events displayed. Greet people walking by and offer them a balloon/sticker. Play fun music and have someone take pictures of the event.

Tips & Tricks

• Consider taping information sheets [or if Respect Life Week, the week's schedule] to the bottom of the balloons' strings
• Have sign-ups for different shifts during the allotted time, and assign roles to volunteers such as balloon blowers, string tiers, and sticker or balloon distributers
• Cut string in advance so you don't have to do it the day of

What You Can Learn from Unborn Babies

Most of my stress comes from things I need to do. Homework, club meetings, social activities, laundry, and emails, to name just a few. Not a day goes by when I don't wish I could do more. And under the pressure of deadlines and due dates, I can start to question myself. Why am I not more productive? Why didn't I accomplish more? Why am I not faster, smarter, more effective in my tasks?

I don't want to let anyone down. I want to prove myself - to show that I can do a good job, that I can handle all of it, that I CAN do it all. And then I even start to wish I could do more - I see all the amazing things my friends are doing, and I start to wish I could do those things, too.

Revelation

I've spent years fighting to show the world that unborn babies are full human beings - whole, complete, worthy of being protected and loved. But you know what? Unborn babies - they have yet to DO anything. And what I have been seeking to show the world is that they are just as valuable as all of us who are born, running around the world DOING things.

The Truth

The heart of the Pro-Life message is that people aren't valued for what they DO - for what they accomplish or achieve or "contribute." We are not the sum of out abilities. We are SO MUCH MORE than whatever we "do" or don't do. That is why if someone is born with different abilities, or when an elderly person's abilities begin to diminish, their value does not!

Live the Message

I can't do it all. And in fact, I don't need to do anything to be what I want most - loved. This is the Pro-Life message: we are not human doings, we are human beings, and we are each worthy of life and love. Our value is inherent in our  mere existence, and our presence alone is valuable because we exist as part of the larger human family.  I am loved the same regardless of what I do or do not "accomplish."

 

It takes a lot of humility to let this sink in. To realize that we are no more valuable than someone with different intellectual or physical capacities, than an elderly person with deteriorating abilities or memory, than a child waiting even to be born.  It forces us to recognize that all the things we do, or don't do, and regardless of how quickly or efficiently we do them, don't give us value.

The freedom in this realization is that we already have value; we already are loved. And if we are truly Pro-Life, we must live this message. That doesn’t mean blowing off our responsibilities or lying around all day doing nothing. It simply means living each day with joyful recognition that your value is already established, that you are enough, you are loved - just for existing.

 



Happy 40th Anniversary, Baby.

So if you haven’t seen this video yet, I suggest you take the 1 minute 43 seconds to watch it.

Now feel free to be disturbed. Repulsed. Angry. Sad. Disheartened. Confused. Now back to angry.

When I first watched this video, I was all of these emotions, plus more. How could anyone, even a pro-choicer, celebrate the death of 55 million children? Does he not realize that abortion in the number one killer of African Americans? How dare he sexualize the very serious and impactful decision of any woman who gets an abortion? It’s offensive, playing off the decision of abortion as something to be taken lightly or joked around about. So much so that even many pro-choicers are offended by it.

But what bothered me even more is when I went to Mehcad Brook (the man featured in the video)’s facebook page.  These are the comments I saw:

This was more disheartening than the ad itself. See, I expect it from the pro-choice side. I expect that they don’t realize what exactly they are promoting or the seriousness of the issue. This is not something that surprises me anymore.

But seeing these comments from those who claim to be pro-life? It’s depressing. I think it’s one of the biggest problems in the cause. Why on earth would you suggest that anyone deserves to be aborted? Nobody deserves that. Why, if you claim to be pro-life, would you suggest that someone go kill themself? Referring to someone as a “worthless waste of human tissue” is definitely not going to win them over.

I understand the anger. I understand the disgust. But hate the sin, not the sinner. The only way that we can persuade others is through love. Not vilifying them for a video made in poor taste, no matter how offensive it may be.

"The sword of the peaceful warrior is love." -Gary Amirault

March for Life Reflection Prayer

 

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace;

 Allow me to bring peace to the war on women, the war on life. Allow me to be an example of peace through my own life and at the March.

where there is hatred, let me sow love;

Allow me to choose to love those around me, regardless of their stance on abortion. Allow me to see each of these men and women as a whole person made in Your image.

where there is injury, pardon;

Allow me to forgive those who have funded and promoted lies about abortion. Allow me to pray especially for those who feel forced to participate in this tragedy.

where there is doubt, faith;

Allow me to remain faithful in this fight for life. Allow me to trust in Your will and continued presence here with us.

where there is despair, hope;

Allow me to bring hope to the prolife movement. Allow me to be an example of hope in our world for a culture of life and love.

where there is darkness, light;

Allow me to bring light to the darkness surrounding abortion. Allow me to be a light for You to work through and call others to You.

and where there is sadness, joy.

Allow me to bring joy to Washington D.C. and the March for Life. Allow me to recognize each and every day as a gift and to fill each of my days with joy.

 

-St. Francis of Assisi